Alias – Bitch Flicks

Emily Gilmore and the Humanization of Bad Mothers by Deborah Pless

They’re complicated women who have both scarred each other over the years, and there’s no getting past that easily. But they both try. And in trying, we get a better picture of who they are as human beings. Like I said in the beginning, there’s something so valuable in seeing a character like Emily who is, unequivocally, a bad mother also be a good person. Because she is a good person. Sometimes. Mostly.

Grace: Single Mothers, Stillborn Births, and Scrutinizing Parenting Styles by BJ Colangelo

Eventually, Madeline is pushed to the absolute limit in protecting her child and kills those trying to take her daughter from her…and feeds them to her. “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” is explored to the nth degree as the blood of those trying to destroy the mother/daughter relationship are then utilized to keep baby Grace alive.

Michiko to Hatchin: Anime’s Newest Mom Has Some Issues by Robert V. Aldrich

Throughout the course of the 22-episode series, Michiko abandons Hatchin to get laid, lets Hatchin work a part-time job rather than pay for shoes she herself stole, leaves Hatchin with an abusive orphanage (more on that in a second), lets her run away half a dozen times, all while the two bicker constantly about often incredibly petty matters. All of this rolls up to establish that Michiko is, well, basically just a terrible, terrible mom.
And that’s pretty amazing.

The Accidental Motherhood of Gloria by Rhianna Shaheen

Every woman is a mother? Yeah, no thanks. If Gloria is a “mother” to Phil then she’s also a lifetime member to the Bad Moms Club. In the beginning, Jeri, Phil’s real mom, calls on Gloria to take her kids. She tells Gloria that their family is “marked” by the mob. A gangster even waits in the lobby. Jeri begs her to protect her kids to which Gloria bluntly responds: “I hate kids, especially yours.” Despite her tough-talk, this ex-gun moll, ex-showgirl reluctantly agrees.

The Killing and the Misogyny of Hating Bad Mothers by Leigh Kolb

Vilifying mothers is a national pastime. Absent mothers, celebrity mothers, helicopter mothers, working mothers, stay-at-home mothers, mothers with too many children, mothers with too few children, women who don’t want to be or can’t be mothers–for women, there’s no clear way to do it right.

“The More You Deny Me, the Stronger I’ll Get”: On The Babadook, Mothers, and Mental Illness by Elizabeth King

Most people I talked to and most of the reviews that I read about The Babadook concluded that the film is about motherhood or mother-son relations. While I agree, I also really tuned in on the complicating element to this whole narrative, which is that the mother is mentally ill.

Mommy: Her Not Him by Ren Jender

I went into Mommy, the magnificent film from out, gay, Québécois prodigy Xavier Dolan (he’s 26 and this feature is the fifth he’s written and directed) knowing that Anne Dorval, who plays the title character, was being touted in some awards circles as a possible nominee for “Best Actress” in 2014 (she’s flawless in this role, certainly better than the other Best Actress nominees I saw)–as opposed to “Best Supporting Actress.” But this film (which won the Jury Prize at Cannes) kept surpassing my expectations by keeping its focus on her and not the one who would be the main character of any other film: her at turns charismatic, obnoxious and violent 15-year-old, blonde son, Steve (an incredible Antoine-Olivier Pilon).

Gambling for Love and Power by Erin Blackwell

These two characters’ inability to see each other as anything other than personal property emerges as the compelling dramatic engine of unfolding events involving far more sinister agents, who eventually exploit the fissure in the mother-daughter bond.

The Babadook and the Horrors of Motherhood by Caroline Madden

Amelia didn’t need to be possessed to have feelings of vitriol towards her son; they were already there, lurking inside her at the beginning. Rarely, if ever, is a mother depicted in film this way. Mothers are expected to be completely accepting and loving towards their child 24/7, despite any hardships or challenges their child presents to them.

Viy: Incestuous Mother as Horror Monster by Brigit McCone

For women, male anxieties over female abusers combine great risk of demonization with great opportunity to forge connection. Men, like women, understand boundaries primally through their own bodies and identification. Rejecting one’s own abuse teaches one to fight against all abuse; excusing it teaches one to abuse.

Splice: Womb Horror and the Mother Scientist by Mychael Blinde

Splice explores gendered body horror at the locus of the womb, reveling in the horror of procreation. It touches on themes of bestiality, incest, and rape. It’s also a movie about being a mom.

Ever After: A Wicked Stepmother with Some Fairy Godmother Tendencies by Emma Kat Richardson

As an orphan of common origins, Drew Barrymore’s spunky protagonist, Danielle de Barbarac, is forced into a life of servitude to her father’s widow, the Baroness Rodmilla de Ghent, and the Baroness’s two natural daughters, Jacqueline and Marguerite. As Baroness Rodmilla, Anjelica Houston is equal parts breathtaking as she is fearsome, as cruel as she is oddly sympathetic.

Bad Mothers Are the Law of Shondaland by Scarlett Harris

It’s fascinating that all four of Shonda Rhimes’ protagonists have strained relationships with their mothers… Shondaland’s shows work to combat the stereotype that if you don’t have a functional family unit, replete with a doting, competent mother, you’re alone in the world.

Spy Mom: Motherhood vs. Career in the Alias Universe by Katie Bender

This conflict drives Sydney’s arc and establishes a recurring question at the heart of Alias: can you be both a mother and a spy? … Sydney’s own mother Irina figures powerfully into this conflict. … Yet Irina’s arc throughout Alias is the tension between her desire for a relationship with her daughter and her independence as a spy.

Riding in Cars with Boys and Post-Maternal Female Agency by CG

Riding in Cars with Boys showcases a humanity to women who are mothers that our media lacks. Women are constantly punished and depowered for their sexuality, and their motherhood status is often used as another way to control in media.

The Strange Love of Mildred Pierce by Stacia Kissack Jones

Elements of Mildred Pierce play on the maternal sacrifice narratives that made films like Stella Dallas (1937) and The Sin of Madelon Claudet (1931) so powerful, and updates them for a more cynical era, positing that her sacrifice has not saved her children but ruined them…

We Need to Talk about Kevin‘s Abject Mother by Sarah Smyth

The film relocates the fears surrounding motherhood away from the patriarchal fears of abjection to the female and feminist fears of fulfillment.

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Is Kris Jenner a Bad Mother? by Scarlett Harris

When their lives are out there for all the world to see, it’s easy to judge the Kardashians.

Controlling Mothers in Carrie, Mommie Dearest and Now Voyager by Al Rosenberg

These three “bad moms” fashion themselves the Moirai, the Fates, the three women in control of everything on earth. …These films were just the start of audiences’ obsession with controlling mothers. We continue to see these tropes replayed in a multitude of ways.

This guest post by Katie Bender is part of our theme week on Bad Mothers.

Irina: “You should know something, Sydney. I never wanted to have a child. The KGB demanded it. They knew it would ensure [your father’s] allegiance to me. You were simply a means to an end. And then when the doctor put you in my arms and I looked at you, so fragile, all I could think was, how could I have made such a terrible mistake. And at that moment I was sure of one thing. I couldn’t be an agent and a mother. I’d either fail at one or both. And I chose to fail at being a mother. In time you’ll learn…you can’t do both.”

Sydney: “Watch me.”

—“Maternal Instinct”

In setting up the story of Sydney Bristow, grad student/covert CIA officer, J.J. Abrams’ television series Alias hit a lot of the usual spy-story stand-bys: glamorous locales, top secret missions, high-tech gadgets, and for the main character, a measure of isolation. Sydney’s friends and fiancé are unaware of her double life, and with parents out of the picture (mother dead, father estranged) she has no family around. Then her fiancé’s casual mention of children raises the inherent conflict between Sydney’s career as a spy and her potential future as a mother. This conflict drives Sydney’s arc and establishes a recurring question at the heart of Alias: can you be both a mother and a spy?

Irina Derevko: “You must have known this day would come. I could have prevented all this, of course. You were so small when you were born. It would have been so easy.”

—“The Enemy Walks In”

Sydney’s own mother Irina figures powerfully into this conflict. The revelation that Irina is not only alive, but a former KGB officer who abandoned her family by faking her own death, shatters Sydney’s idealized view of her mother. Irina’s reunion with her daughter is anything but tender – she ends their interview by shooting Sydney – and from her first lines she makes it clear that she chose a spy career over motherhood a long time ago. For Irina, motherhood and espionage are mutually exclusive, regardless of her personal feelings for Sydney.

Irina Derevko: “I need you to understand, I was eighteen when the KGB recruited me. For a woman to be asked to serve her country it was a future. It meant empowerment, independence. I was a fool to think that any ideology could come before my daughter. Sydney…”

—“The Abduction”

Yet Irina’s arc throughout Alias is the tension between her desire for a relationship with her daughter and her independence as a spy. As she becomes a larger part of Sydney’s life, she makes genuine attempts to forge a connection with her daughter, even expressing regret at the things she missed in Sydney’s childhood. She acts with concern for Sydney’s well-being, shows pride in her daughter’s accomplishments and, in a few rare moments, allows a flicker of vulnerability to show. Perhaps most significantly, despite her acknowledgement of her decision to pursue espionage over motherhood, she consistently self-identifies as Sydney’s mother and asserts that relationship repeatedly throughout the span of the show.

Sydney Bristow: “You orchestrated the whole thing, because you wanted this. And when… When you couldn’t torture it out of me, you came to me as my mother.“

Irina Derevko: “I am your mother.”

—“Maternal Instinct”

But while Irina may be seeking some measure of redemption in her daughter’s eyes, she’s not looking to change. Each time the choice between motherhood and her life as a spy recurs throughout the series, Irina invariably prioritizes espionage over her daughter. Her attempts to connect with Sydney, sincere though they are, serve an additional purpose of allowing her to acquire classified intel which leads her to abandon her daughter a second time. She risks her freedom to deliver Sydney’s baby, but reaffirms her choice to Sydney in dialogue. Irina’s ambiguous morality throughout the show makes her a fascinating character, and in watching her fight to build a relationship with her daughter in spite of her choices, it’s hard not to have a measure of sympathy for her.

Irina Derevko: “You’re too forgiving, Sydney. Don’t pretend I’m something I’m not. I’ve never been a real mother to you and… you don’t owe me a second chance.”

—“A Free Agent”

Still, in the end, the show determines that Irina’s choices have placed her beyond saving. As her choices are portrayed largely through the lens of Sydney’s experience, every decision Irina makes that elevates her own desires above her relationships is viewed as a failing. Ultimately, her choice of her lifelong ambition over her daughter proves her downfall. Her failure is driven home in the series finale as Sydney is shown surrounded by her own children, about to set off on a mission – the picture of a successful spy mom having it all. Perhaps, as the show suggests, Irina’s decision between espionage and family was a false dichotomy all along. Or perhaps it is through Irina’s struggle that Sydney is able to discern her own path as both spy and mother.

Katie Bender is a musician and writer in the Seattle area, where she collaborates with her co-author/ruthless editor Jennifer Hughes.

Tag: Alias

Bad Mothers: The Roundup

Spy Mom: Motherhood vs. Career in the ‘Alias’ Universe