Written by Robin Hitchcock
I’ve made it a tradition to watch National Treasure every 4th of July, not only because it is a fantastic dumb-fun movie, but because I don’t own Independence Day (who am I kidding, I would just do a double feature).
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| Abigail Chase (Diane Kruger) in National Treasure |
So I had planned to do an appreciation post celebrating Abigail Chase, the Smurfette of this goofy movie played by the exquisite Diane Kruger. And she is wonderful, as I’ll explain in a moment, but I find myself pretty disturbed by how quickly she gets over essentially being kidnapped by a pair of lunatic criminals. Not since Beauty and the Beast’s Belle has a tough and lovable movie character had such disturbing symptoms of Stockholm Syndrome.
Abigail starts out charmingly sassing Nicolas Cage’s Ben Gates, whackadoo treasure hunter who tells her there’s a map on the back of the Declaration of Independence. She asks to see one of the many clues that led him on his Dan Brown-ian mystery quest, but he doesn’t have it anymore. “Did Bigfoot take it?” she asks.
Oh, another bit in that first meeting that makes me just love her. She explains her accent is German, and doofy sidekick Riley incredulously asks, “You’re not American?” She replies, “Oh, I’m American. I just wasn’t born here.” Statue of Liberty FIST PUMP!
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| Abigail in action hero mode |
Before her Stockholm Syndrome sets in, Abigail awesomely and badassly tries to stop our alleged heroes’ theft of the Declaration of Independence, snatching it (or what she thinks is it) out of Ben’s hands and hanging off a truck to keep it away from the Really Bad Guys (who are adorably British—THE VERY ENEMY WE DECLARED INDEPENDENCE FROM!). All while wearing a really beautiful dress!
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| Abigail’s stunning dress. LOVE IT, COVET. |
Ben saves her from being kidnapped by the Really Bad Guys by kidnapping her himself, much like he stole the Declaration of Independence to stop them from stealing it. And he’s extremely rude to her, telling her to shut up over and over again, and when she yanks the real document out of his hands and tries to run away (still in her formal wear, mind you) he picks her up bodily. Just in case there was any doubt she was being kidnapped.
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| Abigail starts cooperating |
Somewhere along the way (around when Ben convinces her there actually is a treasure to be found) she goes along willingly. You could argue that this is just because of her personal interest in history and curiosity about the treasure. BUT THEN SHE GETS ALL SMOOCHY WITH BEN. Girlfriend, that dude does not deserve your kisses.
Later he drops her off a rickety swinging platform to save the Declaration, but at least when he apologizes for it she tells him not to apologize because “I would have done exactly the same thing to you.” But then Ben makes a frowny face because he’s a jerkwad.
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| Ben disregarding Abigail’s safety |
And the final insult: even though Abigail has done a significant part of the work following the clues to the treasure, and put her life in danger, she isn’t rewarded. Riley and Ben collectively take 1% of the value of the treasure, which is enough to buy Ben a palatial estate and Riley a sports car (and general economic security, presumably). Riley says he got “one half of one percent.” It stands to reason that Ben got the other half. Leaving nothing for Abigail! Except a relationship with Ben. HER KIDNAPPER.
But I still love her despite her questionable choices.
Happy Fourth of July to our US-ian readers!
Robin Hitchcock is an American writer living in Cape Town, South Africa. She misses her beloved home country extra hard today.